Guest Blog: No Name Calling Month
Unhooked Books is proud to join forces with others around the world to declare January as No Name-Calling Month. Why? Because name-callers cause a lot of hidden damage that we tend to intentionally deny and avoid.
Name-callers are bullies and no one likes to be bullied.
Do you know that more young people in the U.S. die by suicide than car crashes, according to the American Journal of Public Health? Around the globe, suicide rates among indigenous people such as the Aboriginal in Australia, Native Americans and Eskimos in the U.S. is extraordinarily high. Reports link negative childhood experiences as a leading cause of suicide and one could easily speculate that name-calling/bullying, whether by peers, parents or siblings, was part of the negative childhood experience.
If you are a parent, set a good example for your kids. Don’t call names. We see more and more adults using terminology like “bitch”, “skank”, “ho” and other unflattering names as part of everyday conversation. Your kids take your example as a cue to do it themselves. Then they become bullies. Don’t do it yourself and don’t tolerate it in your kids.
The most emotionally healthy child can be impacted by name-calling, so think about those who have mental health and emotional issues. Imagine how much harder it is for them to combat and survive name-calling and bullying.
In the book, It’s All Your Fault!, author Bill Eddy points out that people who have high-conflict personalities engage in a pattern of personal attacks, which usually includes name-calling. When the attack is personal, it’s a big red flag that you’re dealing with a high-conflict person and you’ll need to do the opposite of what you do with everyone else. They attack your education, weight, height, hair color, career choice, level of career, clothing, financial status, anything personal. Eddy lays out a simple solution to dealing with name-callers in It’s All Your Fault! 12 Tips for Managing People Who Blame Others for Everything and BIFF: Quick Responses to High Conflict People, Their Personal Attacks, Hostile Email and Social Media Meltdowns.
Controlling Perfectionists, people who may suffer from Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder, tend to be name-callers and put others down, according to authors Dr. Neil Lavender and Dr. Alan Cavaiola, in Impossible to Please: How to Deal with Perfectionist Coworkers, Controlling Spouses, and Other Incredibly Critical People. They give tips to handle the name-caller in your life.
Join Unhooked Books this month as we explore how to handle name-callers in your life and how to reverse and prevent your child from becoming a name-calling bully by teaching them empathy.
About the Author
Megan Hunter is founder and CEO of Unhooked Books and Life Unhooked, a speaking, training and consulting company that provides a fresh perspective and approach to help companies and individuals identify and overcome the damaging behaviors of HCD’s – whether they are employees, customers, vendors, board members, or anyone in your life. Most importantly we help you ‘unhook’ from these peoples’ behaviors so that you can make the right, next decisions – cleanly and clearly. She is also the co-founder of the High Conflict Institute launched in 2007 with Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq., an internationally renowned expert in High Conflict Personalities. She has been the recipient of several awards including the President’s Award by the Arizona Family Support Council (2005), the Friend of Psychology Award by the Arizona Psychology Association (2006) and the Outstanding Contribution Award by the Association of Family and Conciliation Courts (2010). She is a volunteer in several organizations including a member of Tanzania Project and Vice President of Personality Disorder Awareness Network (PDAN). She holds a BA degree in business from Chadron State College and an MBA from the University of Phoenix. To contact Megan about speaking engagements or to gather more information, email firstname.lastname@example.org