Give the Gift of BIFF! Check it out on YouTube!

For the past 6 years we have been teaching BIFF Responses to hostile and inaccurate communications – especially emails. These are usually written responses that are: Brief, Informative, Friendly and Firm. We teach this method to parents in divorce, employees and managers at work, between neighbors, customer service representatives and even high school students. The feedback has been great! People love giving a brief and informative response to someone who has obviously “lost it” and has written them a hostile email or letter – bullying or blaming them for all kinds of things. By responding calmly with a BIFF response, the person writing it looks really good and can feel proud of getting “unhooked” from a pointless back and forth of useless criticisms.

We have even received feedback that parents using this method in high-conflict divorce cases have looked so good that their “ex” starts writing in the same BIFF format – without even being taught how to do it! In other words, BIFF responses may be contagious!

After our seminars for workplace professionals (human resources, healthcare professionals, etc.), we have received several comments telling us they used it right away in writing a letter or email that calmed a hostile person. PLUS, these BIFF writers’ supervisors have told them they wrote some of the best letters that they had ever seen!

Now we’re so excited about the success of teaching and writing BIFFs that we have made a short video about the method, which has been posted on YouTube, along with a short video about our book: “It’s All Your Fault!”

If you like what you see, please pass this on to your friends and relatives – and also think about giving them the BIFF book or a BIFF Coaching session as a gift! Better yet, buy ten BIFF books for your family, friends and co-workers! Then they can all write confidently to each other, knowing that at least ten people in their lives will be writing informative letters and emails, rather than the hostile and bullying stuff we see so often these days.

Maybe we can change the way the world talks, writes – and manages conflict!

Best wishes for the holidays!

Bill Eddy, President, High Conflict Institute

Megan Hunter, President, Unhooked Books


About Bill Eddy William A. (“Bill”) Eddy, L.C.S.W., J.D. is a family law attorney, therapist and mediator, with over thirty years’ experience working with children and families.  He is the Senior Family Mediator at the National Conflict Resolution Center in San Diego, California.  He is also the President of the High Conflict Institute, which provides speakers, trainers and consultants on the subject of managing high-conflict people in legal disputes, workplace disputes, healthcare and education.  He has taught Negotiation and Mediation at the University of San Diego School of Law and he teaches Psychology of Conflict at the Strauss Institute for Dispute Resolution at Pepperdine University School of Law.  He is the author of several books, including:

Splitting: Protecting Yourself While Divorcing Someone with Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorder

BIFF: Quick Responses to High Conflict People, Their Personal Attacks, Hostile Email and Social Media Meltdowns

It’s All Your Fault! 12 Tips for Managing People Who Blame Others for Everything

For more information about Bill Eddy, please visit:


Megan Hunter and Life Unhooked:

Megan Hunter is founder and CEO of and Life Unhooked, a speaking, training and consulting company that provides a fresh perspective and approach to help companies and individuals identify and overcome the damaging behaviors of HCD’s – whether they are employees, customers, vendors, board members, or anyone in your life. Most importantly we help you ‘unhook’ from these peoples’ behaviors so that you can make the right, next decisions – cleanly and clearly. She is also the co-founder of the High Conflict Institute launched in 2007 with Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq., an internationally renowned expert in High Conflict Personalities. She has been the recipient of several awards including the President’s Award by the Arizona Family Support Council (2005), the Friend of Psychology Award by the Arizona Psychology Association (2006) and the Outstanding Contribution Award by the Association of Family and Conciliation Courts (2010). She is a volunteer in several organizations including a member of Tanzania Project and Vice President of Personality Disorder Awareness Network (PDAN). She holds a BA degree in business from Chadron State College and an MBA from the University of Phoenix. To contact Megan about speaking engagements or to gather more information, email