Excerpt: Reacting to Blamespeak

Posted on February 20, 2012 by Bill Eddy

Excerpted from B.I.F.F. Quick Responses to High Conflict People, Hostile Emails, Vicious Rumors, and Personal Attacks By Bill Eddy, Attorney, Mediator and Therapist Many people initially react to Blamespeak with Blamespeak of their own – even people who do not have high-conflict …
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How Big Is This Problem Today?

Posted on February 16, 2012 by Bill Eddy

Excerpted from It’s All Your Fault! In 2004, a study funded by the National Institutes of Health (N.I.H.) reported that 14.8% of the general population of the United States meets the criteria for the diagnosis of at least one personality disorder. Over …
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Posted in *Borderline Personality Disorder, *Managing High Conflict People, *Narcissistic Personality, antisocial, antisocials, behavior patterns, behaviors, bipolar disorder, Blamespeak, borderline, conflict, dispute resolution, fault, HCI, high conflict behavior, high conflict clients, high conflict person, high-confict people, high-conflict divorce, high-conflict parent, histrionics, narcissictic personality disorder, narcissism, personality disorder, personality disorders, persuasive blamers | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Marriage Conflict Skills Pt. 2: Lessons from 30 Years of Divorce Mediation

Posted on February 13, 2012 by Bill Eddy

I started doing divorce mediation over 30 years ago, when I helped two friends figure out a shared custody arrangement of their 8-year-old son. I don’t recommend being a divorce mediator for your friends, but this one worked out okay. …
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Posted in *Managing High Conflict People, Bill Eddy, conflict resolution, dispute resolution, divorce, family law attorney, HCP, mariage, personality disorder, splitting | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Excerpt: BIFF “High-Conflict People”

Posted on February 10, 2012 by Bill Eddy

High-conflict people (HCPs) have a repeated pattern of aggressive behavior that increases conflict rather than reducing or resolving it. It’s part of how they think, feel and act. It’s been part of their personality for years.  To HCPs, it seems …
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Posted in *Managing High Conflict People, B.I.F.F., B.I.F.F. Responses, Bill Eddy, high conflict, high conflict behavior, high conflict clients, high conflict institute, high conflict parents, high conflict person, high conflict personalities, high conflict personality, high conflict professionals, high-confict people, high-conflict divorce, high-conflict judges, high-conflict parent, Hight Conflict Institute | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Josh Powell Case: Times of High Risk ARE Predictable

Posted on February 8, 2012 by Bill Eddy

None of us can predict who is going to commit a family murder, such as the murder-suicide of Josh Powell and his two young sons this week. But we can predict people of high risk and times of high risk. …
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Posted in *Borderline Personality Disorder, *Managing High Conflict People, *Narcissistic Personality, Bill Eddy, HCPs, high conflict parents, high conflict personalities, high conflict professionals, Randi Kreger, splitting | Tagged , | Leave a comment

Marriage Conflict Skills Pt. 1: Finding the Balance

Posted on February 6, 2012 by Bill Eddy

This week is National Marriage week. As the website http://www.nationalmarriageweekusa.org/ says: “February 7th to 14th every year is a collaborative effort to encourage many diverse groups to strengthen individual marriages, reduce the divorce rate, and build a stronger marriage culture, …
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New Ways in Canada for Separating and Divorcing Families

Posted on February 3, 2012 by Bill Eddy

On Jan. 24 and 25, I did a whirlwind tour of three cities in southern Alberta in Canada, training 60 judges in the New Ways for Families method. For those who aren’t aware, Calgary and Medicine Hat (a city of …
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Posted in *Managing High Conflict People, *New Ways for Families, Bill Eddy, Blamespeak, child center divorce, child custody, family court, family law, family law system | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

February 2012 Newsletter

Posted on February 1, 2012 by Bill Eddy

In this issue: Coaching for BIFF Reponses Marriage is Declining Rapidly! Does it Matter? Handling High-Conflict People in Separation & Divorce Happy New Year – HCI at 4 Click here to read this month’s issue.
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Splitting America, Part 3: The Distorting Role of the Media

Posted on February 1, 2012 by Bill Eddy

Mitt Romney won the Florida Republican primary on Tuesday, after spending nearly $7 million in the past week by his election committee and his SuperPac. The day before, Rick Santorum, one of the losing candidates, complained: “We deserve better than …
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Posted in *Managing High Conflict People, Bill Eddy, high conflict institute, splitting | Tagged , , , , , | 1 Comment

Splitting America – Part 2: Left and Right Brain Conflict Resolution

Posted on January 26, 2012 by Bill Eddy

In the previous blog, I wrote about the dynamic of “splitting” – the tendency for some people to see others as all-good or all-bad, and the contagious nature of this highly intense emotional process. This seems to have entered our …
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Splitting America – the new contagion in American politics

Posted on January 24, 2012 by Bill Eddy

The concept of “splitting” in relationships has been studied for decades, especially when borderline or narcissistic personality disorders are involved. Splitting occurs when a person views others as either all-good or all-bad, with no grey areas and with an emotional …
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Posted in *Borderline Personality Disorder, Bill Eddy, child custody, High Conflict Institute.com, Jean Twenge, Keith Campbell, narcissictic personality disorder, Randi Kreger, splitting, USA Today | Leave a comment

Marriage is Declining: Part II

Posted on January 19, 2012 by Bill Eddy

I was very appreciative of the feedback on my blog last week (1-12-12) about marriage rates declining. The responses triggered a look into more research statistics and some more thoughts for family professionals. Here’s some results:Remarriage rates: I don’t know …
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Posted in *Borderline Personality Disorder, BIFF Response, Bill Eddy, high conflict institute, mariage, narcissism | Leave a comment

B.I.F.F.s for Business and Professions

Posted on January 19, 2012 by Bill Eddy

Excerpted from BIFF: Quick Responses to High Conflict People, Their Personal Attacks, Hostile Email and Social Media Meltdowns By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. Businesses today have many opportunities to deal with HCPs as customers, suppliers, contractors, partners and in negotiations over …
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Posted in *Borderline Personality Disorder, *Mediation and Negotiation, BIFF Response, Bill Eddy, high conflict clients, high conflict institute, narcissictic personality disorder | Leave a comment

Send “BIFF” to Washington!

Posted on January 17, 2012 by Bill Eddy

Yesterday, Jon Huntsman declared he would stop campaigning for President. Too bad, he seemed like a reasonable person, by and large. I couldn’t agree more with his comment on the way out: “This race has degenerated into an onslaught of …
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Marriage is Declining Rapidly! Does it Matter?

Posted on January 12, 2012 by Bill Eddy

I read this week that there has been a significant decline in marriage rates, especially in the past two years. 57% of adults got married ten years ago, but only 51% are getting married now. Last year, only 9% of …
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Posted in *Borderline Personality Disorder, *Narcissistic Personality, *New Ways for Families, Bill Eddy, high conflict institute, Randi Kreger, splitting, The Economist | Leave a comment

High Conflict Symposium @ the Willamette University School of Law

Posted on January 11, 2012 by Bill Eddy

Last Friday, I gave an all-day seminar to approximately 100 family professionals (lawyers, judges, mediators, counselors, social workers, domestic violence victims’ advocates, etc.) in Salem, Oregon at their bi-annual “High Conflict” Symposium. It was held at the Willamette University School …
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Posted in *Mediation and Negotiation, BIFF Response, Bill Eddy, conflict resolution, E.A.R. Statements, high conflict clients, high conflict institute, Oregon, Salem, Willamette University School of Law | Leave a comment

Strategic Questions For Dispute Resolvers

Posted on January 10, 2012 by Bill Eddy

By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.© 2011 by High Conflict Institute Asking questions is one of the most powerful – and often misused – tools for professionals in dispute resolution settings, whether legal, workplace, mediation or anywhere. When you are dealing …
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Posted in BIFF, Bill Eddy, dispute resolution, E.A.R. Statements, HCPs, high conflict institute, it's all your fault | Leave a comment

Happy New Year! HCI at 4!

Posted on January 5, 2012 by Bill Eddy

We’d like to wish all of our readers, followers and customersa happy and productive New Year. High Conflict Institute (HCI) is 4 years oldthis month! What an adventure it’s been, with both ups and downs! When we (MeganHunter and Bill …
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Posted in *New Ways for Families, BIFF Response, Bill Eddy, E.A.R. Statements, high conflict institute, megan hunter, Unhooked Books | Leave a comment

MDIC and COAFCC Joint Conference

Posted on January 4, 2012 by Bill Eddy

Colorado AFCC & Metro Denver Interdisciplinary Committee Advanced Skills for Managing High Conflict Parents Friday, February 24, 2012 click here for more details! The full day seminar will include the latest research on personality disorders and ways to distinguish those …
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2-Day Training! Managing High Conflict Clients with New Ways for Families

Posted on December 27, 2011 by Bill Eddy

On January 20-21, in Mission Viejo in Southern California, I will be presenting advanced skills for professionals dealing with the difficult behaviors of high-conflict people, whether as individuals or when involved in family problems, especially separation and divorce. High-conflict people …
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Posted in *Managing High Conflict People, *New Ways for Families, Bill Eddy, family law, lawyers, Mediate West, mental health, Mission Viejo | Leave a comment